Bi-Polar

I just LOST IT on my 12yr old. When I say lost it, I mean I was throwing dishes on the kitchen floor and breaking them, screaming at the top of my lungs. The adrenaline is still pumping through me.

Why did I lose it? Because as I went to load the dishwasher he was supposed to unload, EVERY SINGLE DISH in it was the same dishes that he loaded yesterday. They ran through and were still dirty WHY??? BECAUSE HE DID NOT FUCKING RINSE THEM AND HE THINKS IF HIS LAZY FUCKING ASS LEAVES THEM IN THE DISHWASHER, HE WILL GET TO CONTINUE TO BE A LAZY FUCKING WASTE OF FUCKING SPACE!!!!

I started smashing dishes and screaming and he started crying, and now I am upstairs. I told him that NOBODY IS EATING DINNER because of this. FUCK IT. I GIVE UP. These little ingrates were waiting for me to get home to beg for me to order out pizza. When I explained that spending $30 on pizza will mean we have less for Halloween costumes, they did not care. They still wanted some pizza. I made an executive decision and said no. I will cook. I go to the kitchen and notice the sink is full of dishes. I go to the dishwasher and that is where i make my discovery.

So that's what's up. I am not dealing with these kids. I can't. This is one of those days where, if I had a husband, i would leave. And I would stay gone until very very very late.

But no. I am stuck here because everybody needs something. NO IT IS NOT ABOUT ME. IT NEVER IS.

WHICH BRINGS ME TO MY REAL POST:

BF BROKE UP WITH ME TODAY. I FINALLY DECIDED TO ERECT A BOUNDARY, AND WITHIN 2 MINUTES HE SAID, "WE NEED TO HAVE THAT TALK". (MEANING THE BREAK UP TALK)

LETS KEEP IN MIND I HAVE BROKEN UP WITH THIS FUCK BAG AT LEAST 8 TIMES.
I TOLD HIM A WEEK AGO THAT IF WE HAVE A BREAK UP TALK AGAIN, IT WILL BE NO CONTACT FROM THAT POINT ON

MAYBE HE THOUGHT HE WAS CALLING MY BLUFF. MAYBE HE THOUGHT I WOULD NOT STICK TO WHAT I SAID. I MEANT IT WHEN I SAID IT. I TOLD HIM TO HIS FACE THAT IT WOULD BE NO CONTACT NEXT TIME. SO FROM THE MOMENT HE SAID THAT, I SAID OKAY. PAY ME THE MONEY YOU OWE ME. OTHER THAN THAT BYE. (IN SO MANY WORDS)

I HAVE NO INTENTION OF DEALING WITH THAT SELF CENTERED ASS HOLE AGAIN. FUCK HIM.

ok so maybe i'm upset about the boyfriend thing and taking it out on the kids. I bent over backward for that mother fucker FOR A YEAR. and the end result? The FIRST TIME i tell him "you are not going to say that to me ever again", he says he wants to break up. What a fucking dousche bag. I should have tried the boundary thing a year ago, and we could have avoided all of this drama. What a fucking waste of time.